The Emmys, Spader, "Boston Legal", Writing, and Sex

Some years I watch The Emmy Awards. Last night, I was more interested in watching the New England Patriots play football (and win) than The Emmys. Despite not watching, I do care about the results, because I enjoy television. That might not be politically correct to say in some circles, but I like TV. Besides, I've never been one to care about what's PC and what's not.

Therefore, I was thrilled to read that some of my favorites had won--"The Sopranos" for best drama (though its last season was kinda lame), America Ferrera for best comedic actress (plays Betty Suarez on "Ugly Betty", one of the best shows on network TV), and--be still, my heart--James Spader for best dramatic actor on "Boston Legal" (one of the other best shows on network TV). And when I think of Spader, thoughts of sex are never far behind.

I admit to being a Spader fan since the film, "sex, lies, and videotape" in 1989. These days, he may be a little saggier in the jowl and a bit paunchier than his buff Graham character in the aforementioned movie, but, hell, so am I. Saggier and paunchier, that is.

Spader's Alan Shore character, besides being screamingly witty and outrageously funny (part of that is the sparkling writing, part is Spader's acting genius), is also one of the most complex and interesting characters, sexually speaking, on network television. If you watched the last season of "The Practice", you were there, at the birth of this marvelous character. Thank the goddess they spun him off into a new show. It would have been a shame to see Alan Shore's character die in its infancy.

Alan Shore has a bit of a sex addiction, mostly because he's so terrified of intimacy. We are teased with little bits of "how he got that way"--a strange relationship with his mother in a strange family, failed love affairs, trauma in high school. He substitutes in-your-face kinks and industrial-strength sexual come-ons for real love with women--and does surprisingly well in that arena, generally getting to bed every woman he goes after. (And why not? I mean, it's Spader.) But love? Piffle, not for him, though his character has melancholy moments when he admits he's lonely, afraid, and depressed. Alan knows that he substitutes sex for the real deal. And yet, he seems powerless to change that fact about himself.

Alan, however, does have love in his life, and is loved back unconditionally--by the bombatic, blatantly racist/sexist/ultra-homophobic Denny Crane (played to scenery-chewing perfection by William Shatner). Denny would be a two-dimensional buffoon were it not for two facts: he has mad cow disease, so his brain doesn't always work the way it used to, and he loves Alan with his whole heart. Denny, of course, is also a sexoholic, and resists intimacy with women. Yet, these two odd duck males--Alan and Denny--find great comfort and pleasure in each other's company, engaging in "sleepovers" and a ritualistic whiskey and cigar on Denny's balcony at the end of every episode. In other words, real heart is behind the bizarre antics and snappy comebacks that are the trademarks of this wonderful show.

And I haven't even mentioned the other unique, non-stock characters on "Boston Legal", or Candice Bergen's marvelous acting. If I did, I'd work all day on this blog post. But, if you're a writer and want to learn more about your craft, I recommend this show to you. It's made me think about what makes a character interesting, and the bon mots are as delicious and frivolous as a Godiva truffle. Would that my own characters spoke such intelligent, witty, and downright hilarious words!

Yes, I would watch Spader read the phone book, I admit it. But I urge you to give the show a try--ABC, Tuesday at 10 PM Eastern. New episodes begin a week from tomorrow (Sept. 25). If you're a beginning writer, watch, if only for what you'll learn.

Barrie